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View Full Version : Chuck Norris is OUT OF HIS MIND


Dan Silver
06-11-2007, 09:41 PM
The President of the Internet really is batshit crazy. Who knew?

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/staticarticles/article56107.html

-D.

Mike ODonnell
06-12-2007, 05:19 AM
Give a tax credit to anyone naming their children Walker or Texas Ranger (excluding Will Farrell).

Yikes....

Ron Nelson
06-12-2007, 08:14 AM
Yeah, so I'm reading the column thinking, "This is satire, right?" when it dawns on me that it's the real thing.

I followed the link to his website. Again, not satire; real Chuck, albeit not exactly current. He laments his self-demise of "Walker, Texas Ranger" (the best show ever), and to make matters worse, he closed the chat room (due to abuse).

Pussy.

Paul Findley
06-12-2007, 08:43 AM
Did not get past line 9, didn't Baretta cap his wife or was that some other crazy '70s actor?

Shouldn't this discussion be in the Karma thread?!?

Dave Paton
06-12-2007, 08:51 AM
Is it crazy, or is it so sane it just blew your mind?

--Kramer

Pierre Auge
06-12-2007, 09:11 AM
What the guy isn't allowed to make fun of himself? Geeze its pretty funny...

Paul Findley
06-12-2007, 11:31 AM
no man, we are worried he will make the ballot :-)

Mike ODonnell
06-12-2007, 12:31 PM
Don't mess with Chuck.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grg0Yfz8k2A

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI61Wnb5zhM&mode=related&search=

Pierre Auge
06-13-2007, 01:04 AM
Could it be any worse than some of the other options? Really?

Like Really? I seriously doubt it could be any worse!

LOL MOD...

Ron Nelson
06-13-2007, 08:52 AM
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer.

Too bad Chuck Norris never cries.

Dan Silver
06-13-2007, 01:30 PM
He used to have a cartoon series; many don't remember that.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5RUUU7bCWE

-D.

Mike ODonnell
06-13-2007, 02:18 PM
The is no such thing as a natural hurricane.....just Chuck practicing roundhouse kicks somewhere....

Scott Kustes
06-13-2007, 06:29 PM
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

Ken Urakawa
06-13-2007, 09:36 PM
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck can piss his name in concrete.

http://4q.cc/index.php?pid=top100&person=chuck

Ken Urakawa
06-13-2007, 09:56 PM
And another fact, that should appeal to some of the more mathematical folks around here:

The Mathematical Proof for Mr. T's Infinite Pity: For life to exist there must be a symmetric equation regarding the factors of pity(p) and fools(f) -> p-f=0. If any one factor rose to a level higher than the other, life as we know it would cease to exist. The fool factor can be decisively measured by dividing jibba-jabba(j) by tolerance for said jibba-jabba(t) -> f=j/t. With these two equations we can deduce: p-f=0; f=j/t ->p-(j/t) = 0 -> p = j/t. This equation leads to quite an interesting result. As we can see, if we hold jibba-jabba constant, as tolerance for said jibba-jabba approaches 0, pity approaches infinity. Now we all well know that Mr. T “ain’t got no time for the jibba-jabba.” In fact, extensive observational studies have been conducted and even with machines able to calculate with precision to the 23rd decimal place, Mr. T’s tolerance for jibba-jabba has been conclusively found to be 0, and therefore Mr. T’s pity is the literal embodiment of the concept of infinity.

Chris Forbis
06-14-2007, 12:42 AM
And another fact, that should appeal to some of the more mathematical folks around here:

The Mathematical Proof for Mr. T's Infinite Pity: For life to exist there must be a symmetric equation regarding the factors of pity(p) and fools(f) -> p-f=0. If any one factor rose to a level higher than the other, life as we know it would cease to exist. The fool factor can be decisively measured by dividing jibba-jabba(j) by tolerance for said jibba-jabba(t) -> f=j/t. With these two equations we can deduce: p-f=0; f=j/t ->p-(j/t) = 0 -> p = j/t. This equation leads to quite an interesting result. As we can see, if we hold jibba-jabba constant, as tolerance for said jibba-jabba approaches 0, pity approaches infinity. Now we all well know that Mr. T “ain’t got no time for the jibba-jabba.” In fact, extensive observational studies have been conducted and even with machines able to calculate with precision to the 23rd decimal place, Mr. T’s tolerance for jibba-jabba has been conclusively found to be 0, and therefore Mr. T’s pity is the literal embodiment of the concept of infinity.

As a math teacher and Mr. T fan, I approve of this post.

Ron Nelson
06-14-2007, 08:31 AM
Chuck Norris can walk on water, but he prefers to fly.

Mike ODonnell
06-14-2007, 09:36 AM
Chuck Norris can drown a fish

William Hunter
06-14-2007, 09:36 AM
Well, as a paleo guy I was dismayed when told that there was no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures that Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

I know this is a stunning first post. I'll try to do better next time.

S'up Ron. How's that elbow treating you?

Ron Nelson
06-15-2007, 11:26 PM
Much better once I stopped doing pull ups so often.