I think books are probably great to teach you basics of interaction but what I have found to be the best is to truly have love for the athlete and the team. If you have all the tactics but are just doing it to do it people can tell, if you have the skills of the sport and passion for the people you are coaching and the sport people will want to fight for you.
The best way is to make it clear exactly what you expect and what your going to give and the consequences when you don't get 100%. I had a football coach in high school, lots of yelling and always giving you a hard glare when you messed up. It was very disconcerting and didn't built trust and confidence. I'm not saying yelling is bad, but when I'm never really sure why or how to fix what I did wrong it makes you uncomfortable. I'm sure he was trying to build up some sort of mental toughness or whatever but all it did was make me nervous to play which never helps anything.
If people know exactly what their expected to do and exactly what will happen when they don't perform then it is much clearer. They realize the coach isn't yelling at them just to make himself feel better (a lot come off that way) but because he wants you and the team to succeed as much as possible. Some coaches want this to happen but just aren't good at conveying it. Skill sets in the sport, honesty, and passion for both the athlete and their highest level of performance are the things I think are most important to get people to play hard for you.