I think I've got an okay top game for a beginner, except that everyone has thirty or more pounds on me so I get flipped over all the time even when I've got good position and am doing things "right". There's one girl that's only 150 but she wrestled in college so I always end up getting spun in circles. She's really good but she makes me dizzy. lol.
I hate playing bottom esp. when the guys are bigger and new so I get smothered without them even noticing. I know I could just shrimp out slowly and eventually work my way out in about fifteen years. And then as far as subs go I can't get a triangle because my legs won't fit around their shoulders, and whenever I try to go for an armbar I get my knee smashed in my face and end up in someone's side control and none of my sweeps ever work. It sucks. I am trying to position myself against our padded walls so I can get my feet up and do that flippy thing and end up with side, which is the funnest move ever. Plus I can hold side pretty well. I can also sneak into mount sometimes if the guy's thinking too much about why I can hold side and isn't paying attention, but then I get flipped. I need to gain like eighty pounds or something.
Some folks at my gym will talk while we roll, which is great, because then I can tell them they are rolling the wrong way or need to get their hooks in before trying a sub because that's why it didn't work, and they can tell me the reason I am getting thrown like a rag doll is because my base isn't wide enough. I guess I am helping them get better, which is hard when they're new and we're almost evenly matched, but I figure if their technique improves they will use less weight, which will help me.
I think MMA is like the most frustrating thing ever, but what probably cured me from the run o' the mill frustrations was training at a gym where every guy there was an asshole. So now I am just happy that people will roll with me without me begging them and having to set up mats next to their mats so I can do my own drills as I get sat out over and over and over again. So maybe that's what you need. Go to a gym where everyone's a jerk for a while.
Anyway, I guess I was surprised to read these issues still come up even after you're at blue belt level... I figured it was just a newbie awkward stage I hadn't gotten through yet...