I have a 20 month old son along with 8 and 12 year old stepsons. It's been rough making the adjustment and it still can be a struggle. In the last few months my eating has gotten a LOT better and I'm currently experimenting with IF. With your schedule as packed as it is, perhaps a time compressed eating schedule would be easier. Rather than trying to fit in 3 Zone meals + 3 Zone snacks per day.
In terms of training, I've found I get my best workouts in if I do them on lunch break or before I get a chance to get comfortable when I get home. If I wait too long after I get home I just get sucked in to whoever needs whatever at the time. I personally can't see the early morning thing only because I'm typically at work between 5-6am. It may work for you though...I'd try it if I got to work any later.
Something else that I've found helpful and maybe it's just the way I'm built....I like to have structure! Or a goal....meaning when I have a written in stone program of what I want done it is more likely to be done than if I just know I need to workout but nothing concrete down.
"And for crying out loud. Don't go into the pain cave. I can't stress this enough. Your Totem Animal won't be in there to help you. You'll be on your own. The Pain Cave is for cowards.
Pain is your companion, don't go hide from it."