"Winning isn't everything" I mean I've heard this phrase for as long as I was a part of any youth sport. It looks like the parents of whoever is implementing these rules failed them. People don't build self esteem and confidence by getting things handed to them on a platter.
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.
"And for crying out loud. Don't go into the pain cave. I can't stress this enough. Your Totem Animal won't be in there to help you. You'll be on your own. The Pain Cave is for cowards.
Pain is your companion, don't go hide from it."